Yeah, I know that totally sounds like some new age, law of attraction, power of positive thinking blah,blah, blah but hear me out. As part of my year of yes I'm examining how self perception and internal dialogue impact my future goals and current circumstances.
I put a lot of labels on myself. I'm a mother. I'm an introvert. I'm a writer. I'm a makeup addict. I'm a reality tv junkie. I'm a procrastinator. I'm super sensitive. I'm a coffee snob. I'm a realistic optimist. I'm a million and three things and not all of them are complimentary but they're all me. Or at least, they're all how I think of myself. And that begs a few questions:
- Are these labels accurate?
- Where did they come from? (Me, family, friends, exes, co-workers, ect)
- Do they serve a positive purpose or carry negative connotations?
- Are they hurtful or helpful?
- Would I allow or want anyone else to call me these things?
- Which ones can I or should I let go?
These are just a few of the questions this whole process has brought up for me and some of the answers have been eye opening. I've realized just how much of my self perception is influenced by what other people say to and about me. I've realized how often I say things to and about myself I'd never allow anyone else to get away with saying.
I also realized that a lot of my labels are self fulfilling prophecies.
I've claimed the label of procrastinator so when I put things off no one, including me, is surprised. By saying "I'm a procrastinator" I've given myself permission to continue a behavior that doesn't serve me.
I've claimed the label of insomniac so when I stay up til dark thirty in the morning reading, writing, or whatever before I even try getting some sleep, it's not because of the caffeine I've mainlined all day, or the fact that I won't put down my tablet and turn off the light, or that three hour nap I took in the middle day. Nope, it's because I'm an insomniac.
I've claimed the label of technologically challenged so whenever anything vaguely tech related acts up, I typically give up about 0.5 seconds before deciding I can't fix it and calling someone who can.
Being aware is the first step towards change. Now that I know what I'm doing, I'm mindful of using more positive, affirming, language and labels. Now that I know better, I'm determined to do better.
So what about you guys? What labels are you living up (or down) to? What are you speaking into existence and is it positive or negative? How's your internal dialogue?
XOXO,
Dylan
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